I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Ketchup is God's man juice
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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