I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
