My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You are a genius and a whore.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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