Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
