Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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