Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Randomize
