look no pants
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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