Plan B is the new Plan A
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
