Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
