she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
