but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
