Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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