Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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