Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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