know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
