Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
