For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Just invented taco cereal.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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