Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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