She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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