you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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