can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
