So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
