I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
