wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
