Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
this boner is exhausting
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I have feelings that need drinking.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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