im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
