so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
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