He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
