dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize