He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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