I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
You peed on a flamingo?!?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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