No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
