Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
