Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
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