Are we in a gay sports bar?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
