are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
