I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
