I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize