Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
