two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
