she was so not down for the gang bang
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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