Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I think my nap took me to another dimension
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
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