Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
