All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
