I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
