Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
