i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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