I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
A bitchslap is in order.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
