I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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