help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
