I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
