i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
